Pretty Little Lies
I was talking with dome co-workers the other day and I made some joke about the fact that my hair is no longer fully covering my head. Most chuckled, but one said that I shouldn’t say such mean things about myself. I told her that I was not being mean, just being honest about the fact that I am losing my hair.
But that interaction got me thinking.
It seems to me that we spend a great deal of time telling ourselves lies about the things that we don’t like about ourselves. Things like I’m not that overweight/hygienically challenged/socially inept. Or whatever your own personal hang up might be. We seem to think that if we convince ourselves that we aren’t really that way that it will be true. If I buy clothes to try to hide my extra pounds, they won’t exist. If you wear that push up bra, you will have bigger boobs. That comb over will make you less bald. And, in my opinion, it seems silly that we try to fool ourselves like this.
None of these things will change the truth of who we are.
In fact, if anyone should be immune to our chicanery, it should be our very self. We should not be able to lie to ourselves so effectively. It seems far healthier to take a realistic look at ourselves and to accept who we are. This doesn’t mean that we can’t change things about ourselves. But how can you make a realistic change when your self image is based on a lie? If one makes an honest inventory of one’s self, and is willing to look at the truth of themselves, without reasoning, excusing or rationalizing, then one has the basis to make an honest change.
I know the aspects of myself that are not in line with what the media or popular opinion would have one believe is acceptable. I know that I am overweight and that I have a messed up eating routine. I know that my form of organization is clutter. I know that I have a tendency to run late. However, by acknowledging these characteristics about myself I am able to work with them instead of against them.
When you are able to accept what others perceive as weaknesses as part of who you are and can become comfortable with those things, then they no longer become obstacles to your life. When you can work with your nature rather than against it, your life will be more fulfilling and less stressful.
If you want to change something that doesn’t work for you it is more easily done when you have a realistic idea of what you want to change. And if it is something that can be changed.
Or, at least, that is my philosophy on things.
************
Random fact: It's not easy being Barbie.
But that interaction got me thinking.
It seems to me that we spend a great deal of time telling ourselves lies about the things that we don’t like about ourselves. Things like I’m not that overweight/hygienically challenged/socially inept. Or whatever your own personal hang up might be. We seem to think that if we convince ourselves that we aren’t really that way that it will be true. If I buy clothes to try to hide my extra pounds, they won’t exist. If you wear that push up bra, you will have bigger boobs. That comb over will make you less bald. And, in my opinion, it seems silly that we try to fool ourselves like this.
None of these things will change the truth of who we are.
In fact, if anyone should be immune to our chicanery, it should be our very self. We should not be able to lie to ourselves so effectively. It seems far healthier to take a realistic look at ourselves and to accept who we are. This doesn’t mean that we can’t change things about ourselves. But how can you make a realistic change when your self image is based on a lie? If one makes an honest inventory of one’s self, and is willing to look at the truth of themselves, without reasoning, excusing or rationalizing, then one has the basis to make an honest change.
I know the aspects of myself that are not in line with what the media or popular opinion would have one believe is acceptable. I know that I am overweight and that I have a messed up eating routine. I know that my form of organization is clutter. I know that I have a tendency to run late. However, by acknowledging these characteristics about myself I am able to work with them instead of against them.
When you are able to accept what others perceive as weaknesses as part of who you are and can become comfortable with those things, then they no longer become obstacles to your life. When you can work with your nature rather than against it, your life will be more fulfilling and less stressful.
If you want to change something that doesn’t work for you it is more easily done when you have a realistic idea of what you want to change. And if it is something that can be changed.
Or, at least, that is my philosophy on things.
************
Random fact: It's not easy being Barbie.
posted by Eric the Something at 12/20/2005 06:25:00 AM
3 Comments:
denial is a very powerful thing. That and pictures. Sometimes when you see yourself in a picture, oy!
Plus, denying that it is you in those pictures is hard too.
Party Girl is right. Pictures are usually a rude awakening. Then again, I've been told the camera adds 10 pounds.
And for what it's worth, I think bald is beautiful.
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