Friday, November 03, 2006

The Emperor's New Costume

Okay, so Hallowe'en was last week, but this just happened yesterday.

Every Thursday my company has a lunch/happy hour kind of deal at the bar across from our office. Low key and only a few of us show up with any kind of regularity. The wait staff know us and treat us well. One of the waitresses was showing us pictures of their Hallowe'en party and I was reminded of the scene in "Mean Girls" where they make a comment about Hallowe'en just being an excuse to dress sexy. Sexy, in this case, meaning "clothing that you would normally not wear outside the bedroom." Or as a friend of mine called it, "Dress Like a Slut Day."

I'll get back to my real point in a minute, but let me digress by saying that I have been a big fan of Hallowe'en since I was a little kid. I loved to dress up and cruise the neighborhood with my friends to see what they had all come up with for costumes. I still love to see what costumes my friends come up with, but I think that is because I have smart, creative friends who also get into the spirit of it all. (The best in years still has to be Zach's "Zombie Jesus" from 2005. The line "He died for your sins, now he's back for your BRAINS!" will never cease to make me chuckle.) So, to recap, I appreciate a good costume. I really appreciate a creative costume.

Back to the story about the pictures;

Many of the people who came to the party at this bar (The Coconut Club) are attractive younger women. As is to be expected since the bar is three blocks from ASU. I have absolutely NO problem looking at pictures of attractive women in sexy outfits. However, I DO have a problem calling a pair of boy shorts, a mask and a couple of pasties a COSTUME. That is not a costume. That is someone stole your clothes. There is more fabric in a pair of tube socks than in her entire ensemble. And this girl won the prize for "Sexiest Costume." That being the case, the prize should have just been called "Closest to naked."

It may sound like no big deal to you, but I maintain my position that a LACK of costume should not be constituted AS a costume. And, while she was indeed yummy to look at, she was really nothing more than a stripper in the wrong bar. Maybe. She could have been earning her drinks, I don't know.

Let's try the no-costume-costume in another scenario;

Random person: How do you like my garden?

Me: What garden? All I see is a patch of dirt.

Random person: That's my garden.

Me: No, it's a lack of anything growing.

Random person: That's cause I pulled the weeds.

Me: Did you plant anything?

Random person: Nope. I just removed what was there and put up sticks around the dirt and tied string around it.

Me: So, nothing is going to grow here?

Random person: Nope. Especially not weeds.


So, to recap, not wearing clothing = not wearing a costume, either. You have whole year to think of something good for next year.

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